Every month we are rudely reminded of what it means to be a woman. We don't ask for it, but it invades our lives as if it had every right to be there.
You women know what I am talking about...
I have noticed over the last few years the "uninvited guest" has been more forceful, more demanding of me. Not that I had it easy before... First I was diagnosed with PMS, then the doctor upgraded it to PMDD. That means it was max PMS. I had anger outbursts, absolute blown-out-of-proportion temper tantrums. I could not be reasoned with for several days... No, this is not why I am now divorced.
I have gotten the anger outbursts more under control... mostly... More like I stay away from others as much as possible when I feel one coming on. I have found that males get more of my outbursts than females do. I guess I have more patience there because THEY are also not immune to this torture.
But now I weep.... alot.... I am not fun to be around. Look at me cross-eyed, even think of looking at me cross-eyed and the fountains begin. It is pathetic, and I can't stop it. My girls are sympathetic, my boys avoid me.
Then there is the cramps and tenderness. That had actually gone away during my child bearing years. I was thrilled, I thought they were gone for good... OH NO!!! They are back with a vengeance. I think they are making up for lost time.
I was reading another blog today and she was writing about this same subject. She did a really good job. Funny how we had both chosen to write about this on the same day. Must be something in the air...
I saw my doctor today. He was nice about it. Even admitted he (being a guy) had no personal experience to draw on, but as a doctor, said what I described sounded like I had entered the peri-menopausal stage. He actually said he agreed with me because I mentioned it first. UGH!!! Can we bypass this stage for good behavior? I promise I will do my best to be reallllllly good.
Being a woman has a wonderful side to it. We are the ones that get to feel the kick from the inside... We are able to form a bond that I am not sure men can comprehend... We can love and show compassion and tenderness men seem to be immune to. Nothing against men, it just isn't in their genes. Women are the nurturers by nature.
Maybe that is why the other things happen. My sister has a theory. She thinks it is during the "hormonal" times that all our pent up frustrations are allowed out. They are not created by the hormones... they are only released, so they don't stay bottled up. They are our "overload release valve". She may be onto something there.
Then again, that doesn't explain the cramps and tenderness. I guess, as my other blogging friend pointed out, the story of Eve does. I don't resent Eve, I know there is a reason and purpose for why God does what he does. Maybe all of this is part of why we are able to nurture, have compassion and tenderness. Our experiences as women, all of them, gives us that blessing.
And I keep reminding myself... this too will pass.
10 months ago